Outside
by Dark Horse
Summary: Here it is. Co authored work with Zachere. To the immensely popular Aaron Lewis song. Outside. It'll speak for itself.


The official FF8 spin on the ever so popular Staind with Fred Durst song Outside. This fic ain't for the feeble minded. So, you know, if you're feeble minded…anyway. We'd like to remind you, well, I wouldn't like to. We are compelled to remind you all that we don't own this song, nor do we own these characters. Enjoy the story...

**_Outside_**

_And you bring me to my knees_

_All this time that I could beg you please_

_All the times that I felt insecure_

_And I leave my burdens at the door_

Quistis walked slowly down the hall that she'd walked so many times before. She had to be strong, she told herself. She couldn't allow her insecurity to bring her down. Right? And yet everywhere she went, it followed her.Some days it was easy, she could just push it off like raindrops that fall from the sky and roll carelessly down the blades of grass to the ground. Today, however, was not one of those days. Today, it felt as if the world's weight rested squarely upon her shoulders. Then she saw him, and it set her emotions rolling like a freight train. Why, why couldn't he see her? Was it her insecurity? Yes, that had to be it. She would have done anything, cried, begged, pleaded, and yet it wouldn't have mattered. She understood this now. He would have pushed her away, or ignored her just like always. And the story never changed, so it seemed. It was always her. Always the one who was trying to help, the one who never got a shred of thanks or gratitude. No, he never noticed her, and he never would.

_I'm on the outside - I'm looking in_

_I can see through you - see your true colors_

_Cause inside you're ugly - ugly like me_

_I can see through you - see to the real you_

Oh, how well she could see it now. Was it merely the fact that he wasn't with her? Or the fact that he was with someone else that bothered her so much? But there he was, with someone else, and it made her miserable. It was funny. She could see it all so clearly now. He wasn't perfect. She'd come to realize that. What she would have given for just the courage to tell him. She was strong, right? Wasn't she? She could handle herself. No, maybe she couldn't, but the one thing that she gained from her experience was a clearer perspective on what the truth was all about. He was not the person for her. He was not the person she had thought he was. _One day_, she thought, _one day he will know that I'm alive. I swear it, he will._ Tears began to come to her eyes, and she quickly made her way back to her quarters.

_All this time that I felt like this won't end - was for you_

_And I taste, but I could never have - it's from you_

_All those times that I tried - my intention full of pride_

_And I waste more time than anyone_

He left the training center and walked slowly back to his room, tapping Hyperion on his shoulder. It was odd that today, while his mind was filled with the scenarios of what ifs and what might have beens, he came across her. That happy look on her face almost drove him out of his mind. She should have been with _him_, right? No, wrong. Dead wrong. He didn't need someone in his life who would just leave him at the drop of a hat for some two bit chump. Hell, he was above all that mess. He didn't need it. Why then had he stood there looking like some starstruck fool at a couple that he'd seen a billion times? Why did it matter? Why couldn't it just end? What a waste. 

She wasted his time, so much of his time. That summer they had spent together. Time in the present, time spent thinking of her that could have been more profitably used for something else. Like castrating himself or watching molasses ooze out of a jar. They were supposed to be together. He deserved her for all that wasted time. She _owed_ him, dammit. Yeah right, who was he fooling? Certainly not himself. He'd wasted time, too much of it, and he'd done it all on his own. There wasn't anyone to blame except himself.

_I'm on the outside - I'm looking in_

_I can see through you - see your true colors_

_Cause inside you're ugly - ugly like me_

_I can see through you - see to the real you_

Could it be true? Did he really and truly need someone to fill him up? No way, he was good enough on his own, right? He knew he had been before. Why wasn't that true anymore? 

Well, at least now he saw her for what she really was and that was, to his ultimate displeasure, not the one for him. He grumbled, thinking again of Leonhart. She'd gone over to him just like that. He wondered when it had happened. How many days between Seifer and Squall? Not very many, he guessed. Hell, he'd seen them dancing at that ball. There might even have been an overlap, for all he knew.

He stopped. What about him? He admitted to himself that it hadn't been a matter of days between Rinoa and Ultimecia. More like seconds. 

_Two peas in a pod._

It was funny how he'd believed in love only once, and that one time was a farce. 

_Who gives a damn, anyway? To hell with this, I'm going to take a nap._ He continued his stroll down the corridor of B-Garden.

_All the times that I've cried - all this wasting - it's all inside_

_And I feel all this pain - stuffed it down - it's back again_

_And I lie here in bed all alone- I can't mend_

_And I fear tomorrow will be okay_

Quistis closed the door behind her and sank into a crouch. Silent sobs wracked her body; she wondered if the force of them might tear her apart. After several long minutes, she stood, legs tingling, and went to sit on the bed. She stripped her gloves off, but did not wipe her face. What would be the point? She knew she wasn't done cryng yet.

_How many times have I cried over him? How many more times? _She lay back and let the tears stream down the sides of her face and into her hair. She hated her life, hated spending her days pretending not to care, pretending it didn't hurt. Hated having that pain burst out of her heart when she was alone, leaving her like this. Lying on her virgin bed, alone. Broken.

She hated it. But she couldn't imagine any other life. Not for her.

_I'm on the outside - I'm looking in_

_I can see through you - see your true colors_

_Cause inside you're ugly - you're ugly like me_

_I can see through you - see to the real you..._

Seifer paused. What was that sound? He stopped in the hallway, nearly at his room. 

That sound again. He took a step toward the door on his left. Yes, someone was crying. Good, someone else was as miserable as he was. 

Still. He wondered what was wrong with whoever it was. Could it be an epic, unrequited love like his? Nah, probably someone just stubbed their toe. He moved closer to the door and turned his ear to it. Yes, that was an anguished sob. Not a pained sob. He'd made enough people weep to know the difference intimately.

Almost of its own accord, his hand found the doorknob. Slowly, he tested it. Unlocked. 

He hesitated just one moment more.

Authors' Note: This is a one-shot. What happens next is left up to you, dear reader.


End file.
